Oft times I wonder if considering the end of any given time or relationship is what causes us anxiety or if it is the anticipation of what lies beyond that which we know that causes us the more angst. In many ways, endings come with the consideration of all that we have know, or much of what we have known, no longer being a part of our future. We learn how to do things, we learn about people, we interact based on those "learned" subjects, but in an end all those things learned have the potential of no longer being "usable" in our future interactions. Of course, with all that we have learned there will be things that we've learned not to do and things we've learned to do, but in the new all those learned concepts and actions will again be tested in the new situations, relationships or cycle of events we find ourselves embroiled in. The application of failed ideas in a new setting, may actually turn out for the better, especially if the failure was linked to one or more of the components of the prior situation be that people or events. For example, sharing your heart with a person who has proven themselves to be just a facade of sincerity wrapped around a core of deception will produce a different result than sharing your heart with someone who actually cares because that IS their heart. Unfortunately, the tendency most often experienced, is that once hurt, we never expose that part of our life to ANYONE ever again. The healing that is necessary is not perhaps of the original relationship or situation, but for that which has been damaged BY the original situation or relationships, to allow future relationships and events to be successful and authentic. The missing authenticity of the prior will often negatively influence the future. Herein is the greatest need for forgiveness and healing. NOT perhaps to restore the broken, but to prepare for the future. This is exaggerated in situations were the broken is broken because of the choice of the party involved who desires the breakup of the relationship. There is little to be gained in repairing what is damaged when the damage is what is desired by the damager. What needs repair is the hearts and minds of the damaged, to allow sincerity and authenticity to still be viable in future relationships and situations.
The future potential of people, especially in relational matters, influenced by the failures of the past rather than the potentials of the parties involved. This is clear in matters related to the relationship with Christ. IF the past provides so much hurt and damage, some will be unwilling to surrender their all to Christ, because they have "learned" to hide and protect their damaged components from all else and they are unwilling to allow Him to repair and make new their future. So they remain relationally broken, spiritually handicapped and disabled from experiencing ALL that God has for them.
In a "sinless"(nature of) world, all would be restored...including the past broken relationships. But because of sin, specifically, this will NOT be the reality. That which I surrender to Christ WILL be made new, but too often those who are the cause of the pain which He repairs will not be, because they choose not to be. Always in hope that this will change, but never allowing the past to dictate the future potential of Christ in me.